Munga

A few evenings ago I was helping Natalie and Jerry get the video part of Skype working for video conferencing which I’m happy to say met with  success.  Later while I was talking with Nat & Jer, their video portion off, I could hear Jerry start to chuckle.  Then came this unbelievably embarrassing question across the internet:  ”Are you picking your nose?”

Oh my goodness!   I started laughing so hard that I was in tears and could not catch my breath.  I had totally forgotten that I had my video on while going for that elusive booger you seek only in the confines of your home or car.  Natalie and Jerry had been watching me with my pinkie finger stuck in my nose to the first knuckle!  Humiliation!  Funny!

Watch out for that all-seeing, silent video camera! 

A.  Attached or Single:  I hope attached!  I have 2 beautiful earrings to show for it!B.  Best Friends:  Kim Herbert, Anna banana, & Leslie.C.  Cake or pie:  Definitely cake, chocolate type.  Pie is yuck.D.  Day of Choice:  Saturday, I don’t feel like I have to do something. E.  Essential Items:  cuticle nippers, nail file, dentapiks, headband, shampoo & conditioner, my pillow, and a project to do with my hands.F.  Favorite color:  any color of pink, preferably brighter.G.  Gummy bears or gummy worms:  chocolate covered cinnamon gummy bearsH.  Hometown:  I grew up in a suburb of Denver but have been in the Phoenix area for almost 30 years so it is really my hometown now.I.  Indulgences:  Route 44 diet cokes from Sonic.J.  January or July:  July because I love July 4th.  I’m really patriotic.  Also, I love the heat, being outside and swimming.K.  Kids:  I am a big kid so I love to play with them.L.  Life is incomplete without:  Family and being around people and making them smile.M.  Marriage date:  June 25, 1976N.  Number of siblings:  2 sisters, one deceased.O.  Oranges or apples:  Apples, Fujis or New Zealand Galas.  They are really great dipped in caramel.  Mmmmmm!P.  Phobias:  Flying in a 2 seater airplane.Q.  Quotes:  ”My life cannot implement in all the demands to which my heart responds.”  Anne Morrow LindburghR.  Reason to smile:  My family is doing well.S.  Season:  Summer:  I love to climb into a warm pool.T.  Tag six:  I don’t know six who read my blog…EmU.  Unknown fact about me:  I was a debutant.V.  Vegetarian or oppressor of animal:  Definite oppressor of animals.  I loathe green stuff, slimy stuff, squeaky stuff, stringy stuff…..need I say more?W.  Worst habit:  picking; ’nuff said.X.   X-rays or Ultrasounds:  X-rays.  They are fast, clean and you can figure out what you are looking at without having the technician point it all out to you.Y.  Your favorite food:  My mom’s fried chickenZ.  Zodiac:  Cancer.  I haven’t any idea what that means.  

Yesterday the subject of my relationship with my father was one of the topics with the therapist I am seeing.  Judy is a wonderful LDS woman I can be candid with regarding issues of conflict I feel about being someone trying to follow the Savior’s example and having to keep myself emotionally healthy.  She validated my need to stay at a distance from Dad.   She talked with me about what the elderly go through at the end of their lives and their need to re-establish and repair relationships usually without the interpersonal skills to do so.  Judy asked me to set boundaries of what I am willing to do and what I am not.  She said that I probably will have to go see him with the attitude that I am on the Lord’s mission and just maybe there will be healing there for me.   Today I went to Dad’s and helped him more easily access Smugmug on the internet so that he could look at the pictures of his grandchildren and great-grandchildren.  After working on that for about an hour we went to lunch at this little restaurant near his home where he dines frequently. Dad likes it because it is inexpensive and close.  It was good to sit there and try to view him from a different perspective, not defensively with my arms folded but as one of the Savior’s flock caring for another.  I saw him differently. After lunch we went to the nursing home to visit Dolores.  Dad greeted all the staff and the patients by name and talked to them.  (He goes there daily to be with his wife and make sure she has the things she needs and likes: 1 root beer a day, fried chicken.)  Dolores looked really nice and her face lit up when we walked in.  The two of us wheeled her into the dining room where a volunteer was playing old 1930’s & 1940’s music on the piano for those who came.  Some were singing, some just listening while others were nodding.  We sat there talking and enjoying each others company.  I watched my Dad as he lovingly doted on Dolores and realized what a good man he really is.  It is he who has become more Christ like and I had much to learn.It was a good day.  

I don’t like to admit it but aging has not been easy for me.  I guess that vanity has played a larger role in my life than I care to admit.  I Hate getting older!  Media is not nice to the older generations as it is constantly throwing pictures, and touched up ones to boot, of the young, thin, wrinkleless, no cellulite versions, tall, sensual lipped, perky you-know-whats, and so on. Every time I looked in the mirror I saw my mother when she was old.  Eewww.  Then the 3- way mirror that is positioned right as we crawl out of the shower doesn’t help any.  Kim, being around surgery all the time and working with an excellent plastic surgeon views cosmetic surgery like going to the dentist.  No problem, just go and have it done.  Well, I have been grumbling about “looking like Mom” for a long time and struggling with the “old” thing so with his encouragement I decided to take the plunge and have a few things tightened and stitched.  Surgery was done and my sister, Natalie, came down from Minnesota for a week to take care of her “older” sister.  Hmph!  She also was thrilled because I wouldn’t be able to argue with what she cooked and she loves veggies and I loathe them.  Nat thought that she would spoon feed me what ever she wanted but I informed her that there was nothing wrong with my spitting abilities.  That put an end to her veggie crusade.  She was a wonderful help and fun laughing, talking, and even playing games on the Wii! I’m not too thrilled about peas any more….I had peas on my eyes for 72 hours.My children kept asking for pictures to see what I looked like but there wasn’t any way I was going to document this let alone share them with the kids.  They were scarey!  Here are the pictures Natalie and I sent to them just to tease and frustrate them:  This is all they were shown.  The kids being kids were persistent and so after about 1 1/2 weeks Kim and I conceded and send them a picture of my progress:                                                               I’m afraid that we were laughing so hard doing this that it made all the painful times seem worthwhile.  Preston was the only one who replied that he got a good chuckle out of it.  I’m afraid that no one really appreciated my sense of humor. My refinement has came in several parts: physical, emotional and spiritual.  Several issues and complications from medications have made my recovery long and difficult.  I should have listened to the Spirit. 

Being a type A personality mother I envisioned a Currier & Ives Christmas with all my children, their spouses, and my grandchildren, happily co-habitating in our home, which is not well suited to accommodate their individual needs, for 10 days.  It started out wonderfully with Preston, Emily, and boys coming earlier than the rest and all very healthy.  We enjoyed playing in the pool and going to Makutu’s which is a vast indoor play area that looks like a huge treehouse.  It was fun.  The rest of the family came a couple of days later and settled in and all the boys went to play at Makutu’s again and then went swimming in the afternoon.  It was another fun day.    Then came the next day….the first omen to what was to come….the pool was no longer warm and we could smell gas around our swimming pool equipment!  Oh, my!  I started to feel ill as did Mason and Preston.  Hmmmmm.  We had our pool equipment checked as well as our propane tank and the only thing that was wrong was that we had used up all our gas….:-).  Next William got sick and so did Grandpa who was sick with something else before everyone came so he got a double whammy!  So we had everyone coughing and the little boys barfing, humidifiers going, barf bowls everywhere (poetic license here).  Next came Andrew and Uncle Jotham.  This is getting better all the time.During all this we had family portraits done and despite all the grumpy, snotty nosed little and big ones, we did get some good pictures.  Our photographer was really good which helped.  Everyone decided to go home early as it is easier to take care of children in familiar surroundings so the “Currier & Ives” Christmas came to a close a little early but Munga and Grandpa weren’t too upset.  We just slept and to date are still using a ton of Kleenex.     Despite all the illness we had some wonderful memories.  My favorite was Christmas Eve with all of us in our Christmas PJ’s listening to Grandpa’s stories.  That was so meaningful to me.  The kids and grandkids were enthralled by a concert by grandpa and his saxophone.  Even some of the grandchildren got to blow on grandpa’s special reed!Another thing that was wonderful was having every one work together on the meals and clean-up.  I felt like I had died and gone to heaven!  Really!  To not to have to worry about what to cook was heavenly!  I hate cooking!   I loved having my family together and more than anything I hope that my children and their spouses can be close and a support to one another.  Family is the most important thing in life and they will be your most ardent supporters if you learn to love the good and overlook the faults, annoying, personality flaws, etc.  I love you all!

Happy Birthday, Grandpa.We went to dinner with grandpa for his 80th birthday which was a miracle in itself.  We truly didn’t expect him to live past about 60.  Thanks to modern technology he has made it 20 years longer.  Prior to dinner we went over to Mi Casa Nursing Facility to visit with Dolores which she really appreciated.  There we gave to dad his birthday gifts and shared the chocolates with Dolores.  At the restaurant, Applebee’s, the staff sung Happy Birthday to Dad, gave him an ice cream sundae and this made for a nice birthday dinner.   Later in the weekend Jotham, Ruth, Mason, and Quincy went over to see Dad which thrilled him.  They also went to visit Dolores which was wonderful for her.  It was a good Thanksgiving weekend. 

One of the best things about being a grandmother is when sweet surprises come your way via children from grandchildren. I love these sweet children that have blessed our home. Today I received a Halloween card from Mason which melted my heart and I want to share it and any I receive with all and keep it for posterity’s sake.  OOPS!  I need Preston’s help to put this online…:-).  Back at you later

Will I ever grow up? I sure hope not! I have so much fun doing silly things that I don’t ever want to get too old to do them. I saw these cookies in a magazine and had to make them for Halloween. I don’t think everyone thought that they were as cool as I did but, oh well, they need to chill and find their inner child, that is if they ever had one. I took 3 dozen to Millie’s Hallmark and am taking a dozen to each of the ladies I visit teach and to each of the families that Kim and I home teach. I hope they can smile and enjoy with childlike glee the silliness of Halloween and me.

No, there isn’t anything in those cookies….I’m just tired…it’s late and my eyes look just like these cookies!   Happy Halloween!

When I was in MN visiting Natalie she was reading an interesting book entitled “Now, Discover Your Strengths”. It was co-authored by Donald O. Clifton, who was named the “Father of Strengths Psychology”, and Marcus Buckingham. D. Clifton and his colleagues at The Gallup Organization looked at highly successful people for 5 decades, focusing on the positive & taking millions of in-depth interviews to determine their most natural thoughts, feelings, & behaviors…which are defined as talents….hmmmmm. They then developed the Clifton StrengthsFinder which measures ones talents in 34 area they found directly connected to success in any role. After taking the test they point you to your top 5. Okay, here is their tenet: When we follow our talents-the ways in which we naturally think, feel and behave-they also serve as our best opportunities for true excellence.

Well, since I am starting my 2nd life, I thought this would be as good a place as any to start so I took they test and….drum roll…..my 5 talents to be made into strengths….

I am an arranger. When faced with a complex situation involving many factors, I enjoy managing all of the variables, aligning and realigning them until I am sure I have them in the most productive configuration possible.

I am an includer. (I know it isn’t a word but they use it.) I want to include people and make them feel part of the group…”stretch the circle wider.” I hate the sight of someone on the outside looking in.

Responsibility. My Responsibility theme forces me to take psychological ownership for anything I commit to, and whether large or small, I feel emotionally bound to follow it through to completion. My willingness to volunteer may sometimes lead me to take on more than I should.

Woo. Woo stands for winning others over. I enjoy the challenge of meeting new people and getting them to like me. Strangers are rarely intimidating to me. I enjoy initiating conversations with strangers because I derive satisfaction from breaking the ice and making a connection. Once that connection is made, I am quite happy to wrap it up and move on…too many people, not enough time.

Input. I am inquisitive. I collect things. Whatever I collect, I collect it because it interests me. And mine is the kind of mind that finds so many things interesting.

Those are my top five talents….so what do you all think? How close are they to what you see in me?

It will be interesting to see where this goes to make these into strengths. To be continued….

Grandpa was telling Prestion the long version of Grandma Dolores’ hemorrhoid ordeal.  Notice Preston’s concentration.